Night owl mode

I’m usually asleep by now, but I managed to watch WWE Raw on YouTube.   I went out earlier to Wegmans to buy a few groceries.  My care manager very kindly gave me a gift card as I don’t have an EBT card to boy food.  I only bought a few things, mainly cereal, eggs and fruit. It was hot and homie so I wore shorts, my ugly pale legs attracting unwanted attention.  The cashier said he liked my necklace. I wanted to tell him I liked his hair, but I was too embarrassed and it might’ve made him feel awkward, but he has beautiful long blonde hair and has extremely cute. I’m not thinking “missed connections” again as there is no chance that he’d be interested in an ugly freak like me.


The date never materialized…yet another flake.  After mentally preparing myself and spending time doing my makeup, the guy wanted to just come to my place, which I thought was weird. I was actually looking forward to going out, even if it was just for coffee.  I just told him to forget it in the end and never heard anything back.  M hasn’t contacted me either. I’ve given up all hope of finding friendship or love in Rochester.  I’m too afraid to meet anyone else at this point. I’m only here because I have excellent care, but if I lose that, I’m in trouble.

Someone is going to help me as far as the complaint against the security guard is concerned.   I’m not going to say who they are, but I trust this individual.  They realizes that it’s too pailful for me to have to deal with spoken.

I think I’m just going to isolate over the weekend. I have all the food I need and an internet connection.  It’s going to be ridiculously hot anyway and I prefer to avoid WEPs.

I still don’t feel like sleeping. I’m tired of waking up at 3am.  The longer I stay up now, the less time I’ll have to be conscious tomorrow when I’ll be stuck in all day.

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Author: Becca

Dead to the world, dead inside.

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