I have many nightmares. As terrifying as some of them are, I get to wake up from them. Now reality is my new nightmare and one that I won’t awaken from. Though I still pinch myself to make sure that all this isn’t just a nightmare. It’s real though – very real.
I’ve literally lay in bed staring at the ceiling since 4am. I keep trying to think of a solution, but there is none. This is going to become a new America – an America that’s no longer an ally. If the economy goes under, if will trigger a global recession, just like in 2008. If Trump becomes an aggressive leader, nowhere in the world will be safe. Those who supported him will easily turn a blind eye to any atrocities committed by the United States under his leadership. Millions of people will lose their health insurance and ultimately their healthcare. The welfare system will be cut, minorities will be persecuted and our rights will be stripped away.
As for me, I have no options. Going back to the UK isn’t possible. I burned my bridges there in order to give myself a fighting chance of getting better. My parents will not help me, especially as I’ve gone back and forth.
I don’t just want to die now – I believe that I need to die. I don’t want to be a part of any of this.