Back on OK Cupid (though I will probably regret it). 

I decided to reactivate my OK Cupid account.  I had deactivated it after an incident of harassment from a guy who said he saw me at the Transit Center here in Rochester (see ‘Re-opened wounds‘).  I realize that I am taking a huge risk again, but it made me feel at less a little ‘human’ at times.  

I’ve actually started talking to a trans girl in Indiana.  I didn’t realize she was trans when I clicked like on her profile, though it does not matter at all to me.  She messaged me first and seems really sweet, cute and intelligent  and we have a lot in common, such as similar taste in music and equally left wing views.  I hope that at the very least it’ll turn into a ‘healthy’ friendship, or possibly even more.  We also both have issues with anxiety. 

I’m honestly still not sure what I want from a partner.  I’d kind of decided that I wasn’t going to date any more women after so many bad experiences and certain needs I have not getting met, but I’m not going to write it off.  I’m so fed up and disappointed by the way men are towards me online that I can’t see myself meeting a man online anyway.   

I just have to be careful and keep my guard up.  

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Author: Becca

Dead to the world, dead inside.

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